You are not alone. As somebody who has been struggling with chronic anxiety and depression all my life, this presented a challenges to me until I learned tools and techniques to finally heal my chronic insomnia and not react to things as much. Many times we are not aware the power of our subconscious thoughts and wonder why we keep attracting negative or toxic people in our lives, or why we are always worrying about something. Most of us have grown up having some degree of negative programming that we learned from people closest to us, including our parents.
Key is to realize that we have a CHOICE and that we don't need to remain the victim of our past.
Here are a few suggestions that helped me and my clients. I strongly recommend if you have not been able to succeed to find a qualified clinician who can help you break the pattern and keep you accountable for your progress. It's very important that you practice DAILY as our thoughts are the result of HABITUAL thinking patterns and they CAN be changed.
1. Replace obsessive and negative thoughts with happy thoughts/images.
For example, think about your favorite place, whether real or imaginary. Use all your senses. See, feel smell and imagine yourself being transported to this place. Be mindful that you don't do this when you have to drive or be conscious as images help you access deeper level of consciousness and make you feel more relaxed.
2. Visualize a stop sign
Simply visualize a red stop sign and command your unconscius mind to stop. This might take some practice but don't give up.
3. Do something physical, such as taking a walk or doing crunches
Physical activity will not only help you to focus on something else, it will also help you create more of the hormone Serotonin which is crucial for well-being and feeling happier.
4. Do EFT-tapping
This technique is what I call "emotional version" of acupuncture. It's simple to learn and you can do it anywhere! You can check the founder's website, Gary Craig (https://www.emofree.com/). I incorporate this in my sessions with clients.
5. Write down all the thoughts/journaling
When we are overwhelmed, we may even get tension headaches. Instead, try to get all your thoughts out of your head and don't worry about editing them. I used to journal from age 9 until late 30's and my journals even served as a basis for my book.
All hypnosis is self-hypnosis. Sometimes people are concerned with loosing control. However, don't worry - you will be completely present and in charge, you will be just more open to suggestions and positive thoughts. On my website I have several examples, here is one specifically for obsessive thoughts by Michael Sealey, World-known clinical hypnotherapist.
Don't give up on yourself, play with these techniques and see what works for you. You might need to do different techniques for different situations. I find that self-hypnosis is really effective first thing in the morning or before you go to sleep.
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